Expectations of all sorts!

Those teenage years of school & college, I still remember how disappointing it used to get whenever someone would fall short of my expectations. It is wrong to say that I no longer have any expectations but perhaps outlook towards expectations has also changed with years. I don't remember what was the incident, and who else was involved, but I remember something profound that had helped me to overcome the disappointment. 

A passage perhaps in some book talked of an incident from life of Jesus. It said that once 10 blind people walked to Jesus and prayed for their eye sight. Jesus took mercy on them, and gave them vision. All of them rejoiced on receiving the eye sight. All of them started dancing, and comfortably started to move toward their destinations. Few minutes passed, and one of those 10 people returned back to Jesus and said "Thank you".

The author of the passage, then left a question to readers " If only 1 out of 10 came to thank Jesus, then what makes you think you are any different? "

The question left me thinking - and finally helped me to be okay with the incident. There were many similar incidents after that where the same question became an answer. 

It took a few more years to understand that nothing great I have offered to anyone around me that I should expect much in return.

It took a few more years to understand that at times people do fall short of expectations, perhaps that's how God teaches us that no one else is perfect. 

There seems to be one more side of these expectations - Expectations from Self. Perhaps one more understanding.

Not only with others, even with self, I see how disappointing it gets when others expect from you and you fall short of meeting those expectations. But as time passes by, you understand that even you are not perfect.

Another profound message that Morrie left with the world in this context goes as below:

"It's not just other people we need to forgive, Mitch," he finally
whispered. We also need to forgive
ourselves."

Ourselves?

"Yes. For all the things we didn't do. All the things we should have
done. You can't get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened.
That doesn't help you when you get to where I am.

"I always wished I had done more with my work; I wished I had written
more books. I used to beat myself up over it. Now I see that never did
any good. Make peace. You need to make peace with yourself and
everyone around you."

You need to make peace with yourself... you need to make peace with yourself!!!

...before they reach me.

After sangat had concluded on one Sunday afternoon, we were arranging something in rooms over the langar hall. Perhaps we were shifting items  from store room to bedrooms or something like this, I don't recall much but we had to do trips up and down the stair case many a times. I vaguely remember that something was bothering me that day but I continued to join others in shifting of items. I tried to change my focus but somehow I wasn't able to. On one such trip when I was few steps higher than the floor, I noticed this saint standing on floor.

Perhaps in flow of thoughts I asked her, "I have something to ask, some blessings that I need". The distance between both of us was around 2-3 arms but voices were loud enough to hear each other. May be she too was in blissful thoughts that she said, "Feel free to speak. He is here to listen - your prayers, demands will reach Him before they reach me".

I smiled as soon as I heard her. This was around 6-7 years ago in Bangalore.

ONENESS

As soon as the possibility of visiting UK again came into light, the excitement of attending NIS in person engulfed the mind. Originally I wasn't planning to attend NIS, more so for different reasons one being because I had made a return from UK. But with this news of official assignment, excitement was born to witness the first ever samagam, samagam to be held outside India on such a large scale - a step in history of the Mission.

Perhaps His plans, despite timely agreement of the assignment delays were experienced on formalities to apply for Visa. Slowly, and slowly the excitement turned into anxiety. Anxiety of not knowing whether I would be on time in UK to attend NIS. All those whom I met weeks ago would know the level of anxiety. On one such day I sat with the better half and opened up this topic.

Without wasting even a second, she said 'Why are you bothering self over this uncertainty? Have you learnt everything from all previous samagams that you have attended?'. Her questions did make me think - Have I learnt everything from what I have heard in past? It wasn't a momentarily change but it did happen - soon my mind was free again. While I waited for formalities to complete even a week before samagam, but my mind was free from the pace things were unfolding.

Today NIS has concluded and I watched it online from India. I couldn't make it in person but thankfully have no guilt of not being able to witness the proceedings in person. All thanks to Babaji, and His reminders via Mrs Sethi.

Thanks also because He acknowledged and accepted our presence even from here.

I might have been little less inspired than many others who would have keenly desired to attend the samagam, must have made efforts to join also but somehow could not join. I feel like thanking on behalf of all those as well.

On closing notes, I wish to pray that this Oneness that you have blessed us with - may we remain with this Oneness! Also seek blessings for those who have parted from this One, for them to be able to rejoin.

Aga, I & the Moments of The Truth

While at client site, I had an opportunity to meet Aga.

Aga - a young, beautiful, charming lady who sat at the restaurant till. We exchanged smiles whenever we met; soon the smiles turned into conversations. Normally people would spend a minute or less to know the bill amount and transact. But for me, transactions were not only monetary therefore would never end in a minute. I stood there to know how her work was going, how her family was doing, when was her next trip to Poland where she belonged to etc etc. Sitting at the till, she would also enquire about my work, my wife, my family back in India, if I was missing my family etc etc. People standing behind me in the queue would at times also change tills. Friends who accompanied me for breakfast would keeping waiting until I finished my conversations with this charming lady. They often teased me because it was very unusual scene there, someone from India interacting with a young lady at the till that too when there was no direct business involved. Aga and I definitely had a bond – but of course not like they had imagined. We had had many Moments of The Truth which perhaps I couldn’t explain to all my friends. Few such Moments I thought of putting down.  

I had received Rakhies from sisters in India, and was wondering how I should tie those. Somehow I felt it would be quite boring to tie those by myself. I started to scan list of ladies I knew in my neighborhood, ladies who wouldn’t mind doing that and of course who’d value the bond. One particular name that flashed was Aga. Subscribing to the thought, I approached Aga and asked if she could meet me sometime during the day as I had some important task for her. She was surprised but gave me some slot when she would be at break. I reached as per the slot, carrying Rakhi and few chocolates in my hand. I started to explain her what was Rakhi festival, what tying of the thread signified etc. She was quite pleased to know that I thought so high of her, and wanted her to fulfill responsibility of a sister. But in a minute she said, ”Sorry” to me. Before I could interpret why so, she started to explain that they were not allowed to tie anything on their wrists while at work. I smiled as I realized that I had forgotten to tell her that it was I who needed to carry threads on the wrist, not her! I cleared the misunderstanding, and finally she tied a Rakhi to me. I gave her chocolates to share with others. I was happy to meet my “Universal Sister”.

An year passed on, it was Rakhi time again. It wasn’t so difficult this time to get her slot for the Thread festival. She tied Rakhi on my wrist. But in return this time, I had no gift to give to her. So I opened my wallet, and took out a 10 pound note and passed it to her. She refused to take the note despite many pressures from my side, and later asked “Are you my brother?”. I answered in a nod. “Will you give me what gift I want?”. Now this time she surprised me, but casually I said “Yes”. “Give a me a big smile, that is what I want in return” – my ears heard this statement in a second. I smiled, and looking at me she smiled. We hugged each other – Universal brother and Universal sister – The moment was of the Truth! I really admired how she embraced “my” culture, “my” festival despite her upbringing in “different” religion, “different” culture, “different” country. I learnt Universality from her.

In same year, on Aga’s birthday I sat on Facebook to wish her “Happy Birthday” . I typed it and was about to send when a thought clicked to me. Why not send wishes in Polish. She would love to see a message in her own language. Since I don’t know Polish, I took help of Google translator and sent her a message in Polish. During the day I also met at her work, and wished her birthday again. She didn’t talk of my wish on FB, so I also didn’t touch the topic. When I returned home and checked my FB messages, I saw there was a reply from Aga. I really got excited to unfold how she would have expressed her love to receive those wishes. But as soon as I opened her message, all excitement died off. Quite surprisingly she hadn’t expressed anything in particular for me using polish language but had simply written, “aapakaa bahut bahut dhanyavaad J”. Oh my God was my reaction – Another moment of the Truth! Looking at my Facebook profile, I kept thinking how easy it was to bridge differences of languages with mutual respect and love. Having lived in cities where people were so proud of their native languages, proud to the extent that they would even fight to prove superiority of their language, this incident was a reminder that love comes first. And wherever love comes first, the barriers created based on differences of regions, languages, religions etc automatically vanish.

Quite a time, I sincerely pray as the bollywood song goes, “…. Rab kare tujhko bhi pyaar ho jaaye”.  If only man would have understood the message of Love, our world would not witness the walls in minds of individuals due to differences in religion, region, nation, language, etc. This world itself would have become a Heaven.

One Nirankari

Just back from Sangat where I heard the story of the One Nirankari.

Someone mentioned the name of Nirankari Mission in a discussion between group of people. Listening name Nirankari, one of the attendees (say Rob) took special attention and he mentioned that he too knows One Nirankari.

This Nirankari is milkman who comes and delivers milk everyday at Rob's place. The milk that he delivers is very thick and rich. Rob wondered how come this milk is thick, compared to all other milks that Rob had tried. Is there something mixed in milk? Or are the cows of different breed? These thoughts bothered Rob so much that one day he went to test the milk at milkman's residence. 

On reaching there Rob first of all checked the containers, was there something sticking to the walls of container. But he didnt find anything. Then he let milkman milk the cows. Cows also looked of normal breed. All of a sudden Rob sees that milkman is stirring something in the container. Feeling milkman was caught red handed, Rob asked milkman what was he doing?

Milkman replied that he was stirring the milk to let the froth settle down. Else he would have sold froth along with milk to the customers. He mentioned that God Almighty is watching over him, and he would be cheating customers by selling them froth on the cost of milk. So he was settling the froth in milk to be fair in his business.

Rob concluded that this is how he knows about Nirankaris.

Discourses concluded as scheduled but kept me thinking of this One Nirankari, who was so conscious of Almighty's presence that he didn't want to do something unfair which has now become sort of normal practice.

I personally don't know this One Nirankari Milkman but have come across many Nirankaris in my life. Wish I too someday become a True Nirankari....who lives in constant realization of the Nirankar, whose acts are fair as per Nirankar.

4 ON 10 - Life in all humility

I first heard this incident some 3 years ago, since then it has been one of my favorites. This is about Tuslidas Ji and Rahim Ji. 

Story goes that Rahim Ji was well known for his strange manner of giving alms to the poor. He never looked at the person he was giving alms to, keeping his gaze downwards in all humility. When Tulsidas Ji heard about Rahim Ji's strange method of giving alms, he promptly wrote a couplet and sent it to Rahim Ji:

Aisi deni den jyu, kit seekhe ho sain
Jyon jyon kar oonchyo karo, tyon tyon niche nain

"Sir, Why give gifts like this? Where'd you learn that?
Your hands are as high as your eyes are low"

Realizing that Tulsidas Ji was well 'Aware' of the 'Truth' behind creation, and was merely giving him an opportunity to say a few lines in reply, he wrote to Tulsidas Ji  in all humility:

Denhar koi aur hai, bhejat jo din rain
Log bharam hum par kare, taaso niche nain

"The Giver is someone else, bestowing, day and night.
The world gives me credit: so, down are my eyes."

I am amazed and honestly humbled every time I come across Rahim Ji's name and this incident. I just imagine, how he would have actually recited these words with eyes down in humility...just amazing!!

Perhaps this is the 4th item to be kept on my To Do list - Humility. Wish when I breath my last, I would have inculcated this important teaching in my life.

As Ravi Ji other day reminded that "Mitha bolo te niv chalo, Murshid ehiyo seekhaanda hai"...humility is such an important aspect. I have seen so many living examples of humility in my life, that I sometimes just feel jealous :)

With jealously, I recall Upashak Ji's example where he says that beauty in a garden is guaranteed because rose is not complaining why I couldn't be as tall as coconut tree and coconut tree is not complaining that why I couldn't have beautiful flowers like rose. Everyone is happy the way they are.

Obviously Jealously shouldn't be there :) That's another thing I need to learn. 

If you are wondering like me, how does jealousy, humility fit in same post...and if you have known me in person and wondering how does humility even relate to a person like me....just chill!!!

I don't have any humility I know but that's why I am keeping it in my To Do. I pray, and you too join me in prayers, that may Nirankar bless me with a life that's lived in all humility. 

Amen!

SHADES PART 1

Last Sunday we were traveling back to the town when I recalled of this particular incident. Since this incident and the one on Sunday were alike, therefore I feel like calling them as PART 1 & PART 2.

SHADES PART 1 - Some 5-6 years ago I was posted in Bangalore. I and a colleague used to sit on the top floor of the building where our desk faced a window which in turn faced the Sun. The window had no curtains, no blinds; sun’s glare would directly fall on our eyes. Working on Mainframes systems; we found it difficult to read the characters on the monitor. We were so uncomfortable with the working conditions that we had raised multiple requests with the Facilities. May be it was the traffic Facilities had, that they couldn’t respond to our requests. The requests were pending for weeks with them.
One Wednesday afternoon it clicked to me that I could visit stationary and get a wall Calendar which could be used temporarily to cover the window glass. This would give some relief at least. I made it a point to collect calendar same day after the lunch. But somehow I forgot. As soon as I reached desk, I remembered that I had forgotten to go to stationary. I would do it tomorrow with that remark I left it for the next day. Height of my laziness!
Next day, same thing happened.
On Friday afternoon, fortunately I remembered the task. I took one calendar, cello tape, and scissors from the stationary. Patting my own back, I reached the desk. After all now I will be relieved of the burning sun! I noticed my neighbor wasn’t at her desk, thought of quickly finishing the task so that it would less inconvenience to her. I opened the calendar but another thought disturbed me, “Waah Sunil babu  brought calendar just for your own self. Won’t she be feeling the same? You should have brought another calendar for her.” Somehow I tried to convince myself that I would bring her another calendar next time I go to the ground floor where stationary was. But my conscience didn’t allow me to put the calendar in front of my desk. So to be at ease, I pasted the calendar in front of her desk.
And for self I thought I would do it next time when I go downstairs. She came back after lunch, surprised to see the shade on her desk! She asked me how come this calendar was there. I mentioned to her that I thought of this as a temporary solution. She thanked me for being considerate. I acknowledged her thanks with smile but inside thinking why on earth did God gave this thought of exchanging desks for this calendar? I was happy that she was in shade but unhappy for self. I was so lazy that I didn’t want to go back to the stationary again. Height of my laziness!
Aaah...at that point! I now think it was so stupid of me to question God at that point. I asked God that we hear that God acknowledges even a smallest of act, be it in a corner. Let me see how you acknowledge my act of kindness to this lady. It wasn’t that this question was disturbing me but as if I wanted to play with God. I asked Him show me how you would acknowledge this!
In moments, I got back to my routine. I totally forgot about the calendar, window, neighbor etc. Now focus was on the work, although in between I kept looking at my watch to leave on time from the office. I noticed that weather had become pleasant. Clouds covered the sun; therefore it became easier for me to work. I finished work earlier and went back to home. Enjoyed the weekend as I would.
On Monday when I came back I was astonished to see that there was no calendar on neighbor’s desk. More astonished to see that the windows now had blinds. Oh my God is this how you acknowledge that small act! I wondered how come those pending requests with Facilities were now acknowledged out of the blue moon…I had just questioned God on Friday and on Monday I saw the answer! Oh my God…I was so thrilled to see how God had acknowledged my stupid question. But why did you not acknowledge on Friday itself? (My stupidity continued). Less than a second…I realized God had already acknowledged my request on Friday but I had missed to realize it on the same day. The weather which was so sunny for all past days had changed all of a sudden on Friday afternoon. There were no rains that day but I recalled that not even for a second did clouds again uncovered the Sun. While I had hoped that calendar would provide shade to my colleague from Sun, but in turn God provided me (and others) with a natural shade.
I apologetically thanked God for this wonderful realization! It could have been just some sequence of events for others, but for me it was a direct communication that I was having with the creator. I was sorry for what I had asked, but thankful that He proved Himself to be correct. He would even involve nature, if need be to answer his servants call. The only pre-requisite is that the servant should be willing to listen!
Had He not acknowledged that day in the way He did, His status would not have reduced. Neither would He have failed in any test….but by doing so, He has given me an example to share of His Kindness which knows no boundaries.

A man of no/all religion

I received an email from Wasi yesterday who offered to answer my queries, if any on the principles of Islam. I replied back with thanks stating that there are no queries as such. Moreover life already seems to be on direction of becoming a true Muslim.

I later received an email from Poul who asked whether my parents were Christian looking at my inclination to quote Bible.To him I replied that though parents were born Hindu but they nurtured me to become a true Christian.

Oh my goodness! I myself was surprised of the replies I gave, but those were not replies out of confusion, also not to confuse them. I wanted to bridge the gaps that might have existed based on outer layers of religions. Therefore I tried to create a comfort factor to instil a feeling that I belonged to them.

The feeling next to surprise was of gratitude - To understand such basics of religion was never in my capability. While there are people who go to extremes for converting someone into "their" religion, and here was I who was himself converting his religion with every email. That too because of one simple message.The simple message that prophets have given from time to time is such a powerful tool to resolve all differences. Wish whole humanity could understand, and then the peace - both internal and external - would become a reality. 

I later wondered what would Wasi and Poul think of me? I didn't know the answer May be "A man of no religion" or "A man of all religion". 

But one thing I was sure of was that they would have pulled their hairs if they had read what my replies were to other person's email :)

What's on your mind?

"What's on your mind?"...I have always been tempted to reply to this question which one would normally see on almost all social sites these days, sites such as Facebook, Twitter etc. It does give you a feeling as if some one is keenly waiting for you to log on, and ask you whats going on in your life! And you would see people replying also...their revelations, their anger on some event, their love for loved ones, major events in their lives, their visits to places etc etc. Facebook is full of such 'personal' information.

Facebook..another blog on Facebook! There isn't any like or dislike for this site, its just that Facebook played an important role for the learning that I am trying to post. 

While I was cautious not to share much of personal stuff on Facebook, I couldn't resist the temptation to answer this very question "What's on your mind?". I felt as if I would be impolite to the Facebook designers if I don't answer this very question each time I login into Facebook. So I would reply...always with a quote.

It so happened that one day I was falling short of quotes that I could share. Lakshmi was sitting next to me, I casually asked her to tell me a quote which I could share on Facebook profile. It must have been stupid of me to ask that from her...but I did ask. Quite surprisingly she answered, "Sunil Ji, roz quote badalne se kya hoga...baat to tab banegi agar ham ek hi quote ko poori zindagi nibha lein". Thereby she cautioned me not to fall in trap of sharing more and more because mere sharing will not bring any changes in us. For bringing change in us, we'd have to follow those. Even if we stick to one quote, and follow it religiously...it would do miracles in our lives. A single quote that is followed can do what all the quotes which are just shared collectively also cannot do.  

Very profound thoughts Mrs Sethi has - I must admit. 

Since that day, I have tried to consciously remind myself not to fall in the same trap again. Now whenever I login into Facebook, and see that question again...I smile and answer "Same as it was on the last time!!".  

 And to go bit deeper on the learning, this is much of the problem that we see around...we often rush to speak, but rarely pause to listen. That reminds me of this riddle....'The moment you name it, it is gone...what is it?' "Silence".  

Wish we could pause, and ponder...ponder deeper to realize that even single thought is sufficient to bring a change in our lives.

3D - Don 2 (12A)

Just back after watching Don 2...3D version.


Saw a 3D movie for the first time in my life so far. Indeed it was nice experience. Came out of the movie hall, and all of a sudden cars outside appeared to be 3D as well :)


Anyways... Dimensional aspect reminded me of Rob Bell's statement about spiritual world which is outside 2D. I feel he was right when he said that Jesus and other prophets were trying to show a world outside limited dimensions of science and religion (believe he meant rituals without knowledge). Many people are busy fighting for their own dimensions....some fighting for religion, some fighting for science...without keeping a margin for one more dimension. Aah..much like a cylinder, which appears to be circle if you see on its base, and appears to be a rectangle if you see on its height. Cylinder is both, and yet is something extremely different at that same point of time. Wish we all could see this spiritual 3D view!


Anyways (again!)... as soon as I wore 3D glasses, I wanted to thank. It might have taken some 30+ years for me to see a 3D movie but for the spiritual 3D world I am thankful ... It has always been there as far as I recall. 


I am indeed thankful!