Expectations of all sorts!

Those teenage years of school & college, I still remember how disappointing it used to get whenever someone would fall short of my expectations. It is wrong to say that I no longer have any expectations but perhaps outlook towards expectations has also changed with years. I don't remember what was the incident, and who else was involved, but I remember something profound that had helped me to overcome the disappointment. 

A passage perhaps in some book talked of an incident from life of Jesus. It said that once 10 blind people walked to Jesus and prayed for their eye sight. Jesus took mercy on them, and gave them vision. All of them rejoiced on receiving the eye sight. All of them started dancing, and comfortably started to move toward their destinations. Few minutes passed, and one of those 10 people returned back to Jesus and said "Thank you".

The author of the passage, then left a question to readers " If only 1 out of 10 came to thank Jesus, then what makes you think you are any different? "

The question left me thinking - and finally helped me to be okay with the incident. There were many similar incidents after that where the same question became an answer. 

It took a few more years to understand that nothing great I have offered to anyone around me that I should expect much in return.

It took a few more years to understand that at times people do fall short of expectations, perhaps that's how God teaches us that no one else is perfect. 

There seems to be one more side of these expectations - Expectations from Self. Perhaps one more understanding.

Not only with others, even with self, I see how disappointing it gets when others expect from you and you fall short of meeting those expectations. But as time passes by, you understand that even you are not perfect.

Another profound message that Morrie left with the world in this context goes as below:

"It's not just other people we need to forgive, Mitch," he finally
whispered. We also need to forgive
ourselves."

Ourselves?

"Yes. For all the things we didn't do. All the things we should have
done. You can't get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened.
That doesn't help you when you get to where I am.

"I always wished I had done more with my work; I wished I had written
more books. I used to beat myself up over it. Now I see that never did
any good. Make peace. You need to make peace with yourself and
everyone around you."

You need to make peace with yourself... you need to make peace with yourself!!!

Tula marathi yete ka?

“Acha twaanu Marathi nahin aundi” and both of us laughed. The other day, after exchanging greetings in Marathi with Hema ji I finally said “ Mala Marathi yete naahi” signaling that I don’t know much of Marathi. I have learnt few basic dialogues from Marathi, Kannada, Telegu and other Indian languages from my Infosys batchmates who came from different parts of India. And the few lines that I have picked up I tend to use these wherever possible. Perhaps this was another occasion when I was trying to prove my Marathi skills to one of the sister saints who was born and brought up in Mumbai and is Marathi by mother tongue. After listening to my dialogue, she smiled and checked in Punjabi ‘So you don’t know Marathi?’ and both of us laughed.
Both of us at that moment appreciated the hands of the potter who is molding our clays in order to bring humans out of us. It is saddening to see at times people around fighting over the languages, however at the same time comes a feeling of gratitude for the spiritual guide who taught a Punjabi guy to admire Marathi and a Marathi gal to accept Punjabi. One of the traits of spiritual living is Acceptance. Accept – The other being as such. I guess there also exists another generous acceptance where you accept the things what other does. Probably that’s what Hema ji too has picked up - She wasn’t just okay with me being a Punjabi and she being a Marathi. She picked up the finest form of acceptance – she picked up what I spoke. This acceptance in her isn’t just confined to her speech, but every aspect of her living. And it’s again something she has learnt while growing up.
Had it not been your grace my Allah, I too would have confined myself in the barriers of languages, dressing styles, eating habits, colors of the skin etc and yet call myself a spiritual being. Also, thanks to the potter who picked me up and is shaping a true human out of this clay. I know I need to be shaped a lot to be able to love other beings as my own self, to respect others, to help others, to be kind to others, to be generous, to be a listener, to be a peacemaker, to be … Task is too much but I do have faith in you O Murshid, and of course with God's grace whenever I die I should be able to reply “yes” to this question from a famous book -

“Have you ever had a teacher ..........Someone who during your formative years has made you look at life differently? ....... Someone who would look at you and see a raw but precious gem? Someone who would love you not only for what you are but for what you could become?”