we never know how long

Couple of years, perhaps around 12 years, ago Babaji were touring Yamuna Nagar. Stay was at Amrit Auntie's Kothi. Jee and Mom were perhaps at Kothi for some sewa, so I was taking liberty to watch television late in the evening. Other family members were fast asleep. It wasn't silence around, but still I could hear the ringing of the phone very clear in middle of the night. I answered that call. After exchanging greetings, the caller asked if he could speak to Babaji. As the caller spoke more, I could identify that Vivek Shauq ji was on other side. I very politely tried to answer that this number was kept at home, and Babaji would be available at xyz alternative number. Vivek Shauq ji thanked and after exchanging the greetings cut the call.

It took me a minute to grasp that I had just spoken to one of the actors. Before I could fully come out of thoughts of the short interaction, the phone rang again. I answered that new call but to my surprise it was same caller again. Another exchange of greetings, and Vivek ji apologized. I couldn't get what he was trying to convey, but soon he continued his apology, "apologies for waking you up in middle of your sleep". I smiled and explained him that I was anyways awake. We exchanged greetings and since then we both never spoke one to one.

Just wanted to share with you Vivek Ji, that your simple act of kindness has been with me in mind for years now and hopefully will keep reminding me that it takes just a simple act to be kind and we never know for how long that act of kindness will remain!

Days before day!

While scrolling across pages of nirankari magzine, came across these lines in Huzur's discources.."Some people ask why we repeatedly talk of death; we should talk of life. We talk of death because we are really concerned about life."

Perhaps have become more close to this word in past few days. I recall one of the discources which I heard in days of Bangalore where again stress was being laid on the importance of saintliness and knowing God Almighty. Huzur said, "as soon as you ask anyone to take out time for such things, man will resist with a reason that I am so busy that I dont have time even for dying. As if when death is due, it will ask that are you free now? should I visit? When one has to die, he will have to leave all chores in between."

Today when I was meeting saints, many a times dad's death was being discussed. Indeed it is sad to loose someone who has been a part of life so far but somewhere down the line I think we all know it, no one will remain forever. And being born in family where I was exposed to Huzur's teachings in early years, I think I like many others were being prepared for this day from day one. And knowing this has helped us shape our days before this day!

Puriji once said, - One thing I know I was born good, lived better and with Satguru's blessings will die best! Indeed those who have lived and died with you have seen the best of the worlds! Desire is that I too die with you holding me in your hands. Keep me with you, and let every moment be spent with you throughout the life, at last moment and thereafter!

Thanks Babaji! Thank you for shaping our lives.

He introduced Dad!

One of the saints who had come to offer his condolences on Dad's passing away started talking of his experiences with Dad. He mentioned, that one day he requested Dad to accompany him for a satsang program in some distant village. To his surprise Dad refused. Saint tried hard to convince Dad to accompany, also tried to know the reason for Dad's reluctance in accompanying but Dad :), Dad gave some strange reasons. After too much pressure from this saint, Dad agreed to accompany however asked the saint to pray that in Sangat one particular mahapursh doesn't come.
This was second surprise to saint, why would anyone pray that some particular mahapursh should not come to sangat. Anyhow, both of them went to sangat. Surprisingly, the mahapursh that Dad did not want to meet didn't come for Sangat. On way back, the saint who accompanied Dad, again asked why Dad was initially reluctant? why praying for mahapursh's absence? Finally Dad opened his mouth that the mahapursh he didnt want to meet was his old acquaintance who had once borrowed some amount of money from Dad. Due to poor financial state, this mahapursh never had managed to repay the sum even in 20ish years. So Dad was intentionally trying to avoid crossing this mahapursh, because he didnt want mahapursh to carry an impression, that in cover of sangat Dad was there to ask for his money. Dad's reluctance and prayers were to ensure that the mahapursh doesnt spoil the bliss in sangat due to some weird and false assumption.

Listening the incident obviously there was a sense of pride; to be born out of such person. However, eyes had tears when the saint continued to speak "Paise jinhone wapis dene hote hai unko lendaaro se chhipte bada dekha hai, aise pehli baar dekhe jinhone paise lene the aur woh paise dene walo se chhip rahe the".

Thankyou Babaji for 'this' Dad!

'Leg Uttey' syndrome

Lately I have been trying to recover from the 'Leg Uttey' syndrome. Have often noticed myself, and I believe even before noticing myself, I have been having this 'Leg Uttey' syndrome. As I was talking to one friend two years ago, "Have you noticed?, We have this Leg Uttey condition."
Surprised to this combination of words, he asked what does this mean? " Just notice when we sit together to talk something, say for example when we sit to talk about some topic, as soon as one finishes giving some example or quotation, the other person is eager to tell his example justifying the same theme of discussions." "Rarely does one notice that he hasn't listened fully to what other is saying. One example ends, and other starts, and followed by other, but there rare comes a point where one speaks and others just listen. Even when some one has spoken, often I am eager to add toppings to earlier speaker's point. There is no full stop to many such conversations. Doesnt this look like, we all struglling to say as if my leg should come "uttey"? ".

He smiled listening all this. Years have passed, and I dont know if this friend remembers these lines but definately I do, because I still need to improvise on this. Again, listening.. Art of Listening!!

Any field, but..

Last night I was running short of ideas for writing something for Shukar Series. So asked my brother, "Bro, if you had one thing to thank Satguru for, what would it be?". I wasn't surprised when he replied back with his usual humour " That Chottu is my brother". Knowing myself well, I knew he was trying to ignore the question by putting some weird answer. Well this is part 1 of the story.

Part 2 dates back to 1997 when I attended college. One of my favorites just because of one sentence has been Mrs Krishna Kaul. Then middle aged English lecturer once mentioned, "Go in whatever field you like Arts, Science, Music, it wont matter but make sure you excel. Excel so that you cannot be replaced." Years have passed by since then but mind still has an impression of this lecture actually one sentence of hers.

Last night as soon as Part 1 transpired, memories of Part 2 followed. Leaving the professional front aside for some moments, was relating this sentence to what Sheelu said. How wonderful would it be if I could excel in my relations? Brother, mother, father, sister, wife, friend, children proclaim that we couldn't have any better relationship than that with you. If you are brother to one, live relationship such that the brother cannot wish for any better brother. If you are a husband, excel in relationship that wife states that the life is beautiful just with you. If you are a wife, live such that the husband is forced to state that no one other than you. List would go on...whilst it has been easy to put the thoughts, not sure how easy would it be to implement and excel.

Hoping for a meaningful life, filled with excellence.

3 ON 10 - ART OF BALANCING SPEECH

As drafted on 08/10/10...

Moments ago, I was thinking how wonderful it is to be silent in relationships. To hear and not to react, just be a listener...quite opposite to what I learnt few years ago..

At that time for some reasons, I had opted 'just listen'. Quite new to such relationship and a new person on my side; it wasn't something that I was used to.
Around 2 or more than 2 years ago, we had just got committed. I wasn't used to to this relationship structure (lol !)...I think even till date I know nothing...anyways, I was quite new to this side of the world. I believe it happens during initial period of relationships, that you get to impress one another by being something you aren't but slowly and slowly you have to come back to being yourself and then it is accepted in mixed sense at times. I believe I was going through same period, so I had thought that in order to keep peace, I would try keeping quiet; its just another 50-60 years, somehow I will manage by silence. So I started just to play a part of listener in the conversations. One day, one more day, one more and so on it went for couple of days...slowly and slowly, I started getting frustrated by playing a listener.

I think it was divine intervention when I was called for this client orientation session. The session was kept by my company for motivating employees to speak when they are in meetings with clients. I could not understand much out of the session, as was more bothered by internal combat of some sort. But somewhere came the divine spark, when the presenter talked of benefits of speaking up. I do not know why and how, when I returned back I took it as a point to discuss with her the concerns I had in mind. Quite amazingly, those were so easily handled and I wondered what magic these two words had in the relation - "Speak Up". Ever since, anyone who has asked for a friendly advice in matters pertaining to relationships, this is what I have suggested "Speak Up". Speak Up because other end may not have a clue of what you are trying to say or ask...so Speak Up!! Quite surprisingly, this Mantra has worked...

Now coming to the thoughts I was having moments ago, being a married man I am ought to think that way :), I think the learning was half when I learnt "Speak Up", the second part is "To understand when not to Speak Up" . Wise is one who knows where to put a pause, often I realize that whatever I spoke was in no way a value add or a remark which was required.

There's still so much to learn, especially what was taught to me on the wedding day!! Hopefully this is something I would learn some day!

Another thing on the To-Do list - Art of balancing speech.

I have knowledge b.. ...

While having breakfast other day, I switched telly on. Scrolling through channels I stopped at some Indian channel which was airing epic Mahabharata. Recently have enjoyed seeing the conversation between Lord Krishna and Arjun in the Gita Gyan episodes, so didn't mind seeing the episode where all Pandavas, Lord Krishna go and meet Taatshree. Amidst the emotional conversation, Krishna asks Bhisham Pitaamah to share some words of wisdom with the pandavas. Amazingly Bhisham Pitaamah says that if you are here Krishna, who else is worthy to speak? Knowledge comes from you etc etc, this was but obvious statement. However, my thoughts come to a stand still when I recall Krishna's reply

I have Knowledge but you have experience.

I dont remember this dialogue from childhood days of my audience to this same epic. How remarkably Krishna accepts to be all-knower but still gives importance to His elders' experiences. There on I am trying to forgive myself for being intolerant of elders' seemingly un-knowledgable but possibly experienced acts. How many times I have been intolerant when I have seen elders doing something which never fitted my understanding of lawful living, but here was an example of how the role model Himself silently gave message of spiritual living. Perhaps the learning could also be talked in generic sense; why only elders, actually one has to be tolerant and respectful to every individual's experiences.

Having said this, nothing much has been achieved. There's still remaining another part: to experiment this tolerance and add to my own experience:-)