I know what happened

Work has been really hectic these days, late evenings and weekend working - days seem to be running so fast. All I hear is - defects, retesting, scripts, execution. 

On one such day, we were working till late evening waiting for a fix to arrive for retesting. Since everyone in the team was so tired, I offered for them to leave for home while I alone stay back to retest the fix. It wasn't that I wasn't tired but I didn't mind staying back a little late. Everyone but one more friend left for the day. 

In some minutes, fix arrived and we began to retest. During that piece of retesting, I noticed something else broken. I didn't believe at first look because that bit seemed to be working during the day - and fix was no way related to the now broken area. Chances of these two issues being related were so low - I tested again but same results. So I raised a new defect and called it a day.

After reaching home, the mind got little relaxed and I started to think about the new defect. Suddenly it clicked that I perhaps might have used wrong data and hence the wrong results. May be there was no defect at all. I texted a friend that perhaps in hurry and tiredness, I hadn't analyzed the issue properly and by mistake have raised new defect. I couldn't be sure of the data, but somehow became uncomfortable with the thought that next day everyone would come blaming that I had made silly mistake and impacted timelines. Build team would reject the defect next day - this looked more obvious, and my friend too instead of comforting said something on those lines that I felt more guilty. 

I got really upset on how things had turned - and in those thoughts, for a moment I did ask for God to intervene and somehow correct things.  As time passed, I convinced myself to face the outcome next day. 

Next morning when I opened the defect - it was indeed rejected as I had expected. But what I hadn't expected was that Build saying they hadn't delivered the functionality for testing - therefore we shouldn't be testing that area.

I couldn't believe my eyes. I re-read what they were saying - the functionality was working last morning and now they were saying it was never delivered.

Although defect was still rejected but there was no blame game - everyone's attention drew towards the fact that certain functionality was never delivered. Whole day meetings went on - but to talk why was code not delivered?

And btw - next day I also checked what data I had used. That also seemed to be correct  - perhaps I was worrying for no reason at all. 

After a week since this incident - yesterday I got a chance to speak to build team members about same defect, where they requested to retest again and also said that the functionality should have been delivered - and perhaps they had by mistake put comments that functionality was never delivered. There was something wrong which they didn't understand - they were really confused over how things had turned up. 

As we continued to talk on that defect, I couldn't resist thinking about the rescue operation that God had done for me. I was worried about the mocking that people would do, and here same people were making apologies for putting wrong comments.

These days at work, whenever the same defect is talked of - everyone is surprised on what actually happened but I smile because I know what happened. 

Thankyou Huzur!

ONENESS

As soon as the possibility of visiting UK again came into light, the excitement of attending NIS in person engulfed the mind. Originally I wasn't planning to attend NIS, more so for different reasons one being because I had made a return from UK. But with this news of official assignment, excitement was born to witness the first ever samagam, samagam to be held outside India on such a large scale - a step in history of the Mission.

Perhaps His plans, despite timely agreement of the assignment delays were experienced on formalities to apply for Visa. Slowly, and slowly the excitement turned into anxiety. Anxiety of not knowing whether I would be on time in UK to attend NIS. All those whom I met weeks ago would know the level of anxiety. On one such day I sat with the better half and opened up this topic.

Without wasting even a second, she said 'Why are you bothering self over this uncertainty? Have you learnt everything from all previous samagams that you have attended?'. Her questions did make me think - Have I learnt everything from what I have heard in past? It wasn't a momentarily change but it did happen - soon my mind was free again. While I waited for formalities to complete even a week before samagam, but my mind was free from the pace things were unfolding.

Today NIS has concluded and I watched it online from India. I couldn't make it in person but thankfully have no guilt of not being able to witness the proceedings in person. All thanks to Babaji, and His reminders via Mrs Sethi.

Thanks also because He acknowledged and accepted our presence even from here.

I might have been little less inspired than many others who would have keenly desired to attend the samagam, must have made efforts to join also but somehow could not join. I feel like thanking on behalf of all those as well.

On closing notes, I wish to pray that this Oneness that you have blessed us with - may we remain with this Oneness! Also seek blessings for those who have parted from this One, for them to be able to rejoin.

One Nirankari

Just back from Sangat where I heard the story of the One Nirankari.

Someone mentioned the name of Nirankari Mission in a discussion between group of people. Listening name Nirankari, one of the attendees (say Rob) took special attention and he mentioned that he too knows One Nirankari.

This Nirankari is milkman who comes and delivers milk everyday at Rob's place. The milk that he delivers is very thick and rich. Rob wondered how come this milk is thick, compared to all other milks that Rob had tried. Is there something mixed in milk? Or are the cows of different breed? These thoughts bothered Rob so much that one day he went to test the milk at milkman's residence. 

On reaching there Rob first of all checked the containers, was there something sticking to the walls of container. But he didnt find anything. Then he let milkman milk the cows. Cows also looked of normal breed. All of a sudden Rob sees that milkman is stirring something in the container. Feeling milkman was caught red handed, Rob asked milkman what was he doing?

Milkman replied that he was stirring the milk to let the froth settle down. Else he would have sold froth along with milk to the customers. He mentioned that God Almighty is watching over him, and he would be cheating customers by selling them froth on the cost of milk. So he was settling the froth in milk to be fair in his business.

Rob concluded that this is how he knows about Nirankaris.

Discourses concluded as scheduled but kept me thinking of this One Nirankari, who was so conscious of Almighty's presence that he didn't want to do something unfair which has now become sort of normal practice.

I personally don't know this One Nirankari Milkman but have come across many Nirankaris in my life. Wish I too someday become a True Nirankari....who lives in constant realization of the Nirankar, whose acts are fair as per Nirankar.

25/10

Its been an year today since Dad left his physical form. Throughout the year, I think I have used "Dad" word more regularly than ever, and of course missed & remembered him more often. Thanks to Babaji, there is a deep rooted understanding that Dad is so close by therefore feel less guilty of what I did do or did not do.

365 days of this year, I believe ears have heard words death, dad, relations, soul, salvation etc with much more attention. Definitely there have been times when the comfort of the physical form was missed more than the non-physical presence around. But the assurance that non-physical form is so close by to support has stayed along. Since birth have heard that God Knowledge is important for salvation of the soul. However in this past year, have felt that God Knowledge is not only important for self delivery but also important for members of family. It has been such a strength to know that Dad completed his bodily journey only to go back to the source. I cannot thank often for this blessing of God Knowledge on the family including self though there is still so much to be imbibed.

Thank you Babaji for holding the family & me through various forms. Wish the love that you have given me, in strong and silent ways, may I be able to reciprocate. 

Dad, miss you as well! 

we never know how long

Couple of years, perhaps around 12 years, ago Babaji were touring Yamuna Nagar. Stay was at Amrit Auntie's Kothi. Jee and Mom were perhaps at Kothi for some sewa, so I was taking liberty to watch television late in the evening. Other family members were fast asleep. It wasn't silence around, but still I could hear the ringing of the phone very clear in middle of the night. I answered that call. After exchanging greetings, the caller asked if he could speak to Babaji. As the caller spoke more, I could identify that Vivek Shauq ji was on other side. I very politely tried to answer that this number was kept at home, and Babaji would be available at xyz alternative number. Vivek Shauq ji thanked and after exchanging the greetings cut the call.

It took me a minute to grasp that I had just spoken to one of the actors. Before I could fully come out of thoughts of the short interaction, the phone rang again. I answered that new call but to my surprise it was same caller again. Another exchange of greetings, and Vivek ji apologized. I couldn't get what he was trying to convey, but soon he continued his apology, "apologies for waking you up in middle of your sleep". I smiled and explained him that I was anyways awake. We exchanged greetings and since then we both never spoke one to one.

Just wanted to share with you Vivek Ji, that your simple act of kindness has been with me in mind for years now and hopefully will keep reminding me that it takes just a simple act to be kind and we never know for how long that act of kindness will remain!

Days before day!

While scrolling across pages of nirankari magzine, came across these lines in Huzur's discources.."Some people ask why we repeatedly talk of death; we should talk of life. We talk of death because we are really concerned about life."

Perhaps have become more close to this word in past few days. I recall one of the discources which I heard in days of Bangalore where again stress was being laid on the importance of saintliness and knowing God Almighty. Huzur said, "as soon as you ask anyone to take out time for such things, man will resist with a reason that I am so busy that I dont have time even for dying. As if when death is due, it will ask that are you free now? should I visit? When one has to die, he will have to leave all chores in between."

Today when I was meeting saints, many a times dad's death was being discussed. Indeed it is sad to loose someone who has been a part of life so far but somewhere down the line I think we all know it, no one will remain forever. And being born in family where I was exposed to Huzur's teachings in early years, I think I like many others were being prepared for this day from day one. And knowing this has helped us shape our days before this day!

Puriji once said, - One thing I know I was born good, lived better and with Satguru's blessings will die best! Indeed those who have lived and died with you have seen the best of the worlds! Desire is that I too die with you holding me in your hands. Keep me with you, and let every moment be spent with you throughout the life, at last moment and thereafter!

Thanks Babaji! Thank you for shaping our lives.

CONTENTMENT

While reading monthly magazine, I came across this word few hours ago. Thoughts took me back to the trip I had had in 2007 to Pune Mumbai. I landed in Pune from Bangalore and after spending a day or so, I and many youngsters made our way to Mumbai to attend Huzur's program. We all were together throughout the day in Pune, in journey and also through out the samagam. However our journey's back home were not together. They had to return back to Pune and I had to continue my onward journey. As samagam got over and everyone started to disperse, I kept coming across more saints from Mumbai. However saints from Pune stood at one side. While I was trying to attend more and more saints, I couldnt remove my eyes from one of the saints with whom I had travelled to Mumbai. It appeared that all of the Pune youngsters were getting late for their return but seeing I was busy, they stood aside not disturbing me. Time passed but nothing changed, I kept meeting more saints. Finally I saw all pune youngsters started to leave without saying a word. I wanted to bid them a bye, but wasnt able to interrupt the discussions I was having with Mumbai saints. Eyes said bye to each other. After some time, when I got a chance I rang one of the saints, asking her, actually complaining her "You didnt wait to say me a bye". A humble and sweet voice replied, "Bhaiya, I too wanted to say bye but saw that you were meeting saints here. We all were together for past two days, I think we all have had chance to spend time with you, now its turn for Mumbai saints to have your company. Even they should get your time".

Not to talk of the respect she showed for a co-follower, her contentment has always touched my heart. Till date if someone asks me of contentment, this is what I share.

1 ON 10 - A Friendly Ear

Heard this from Shastri Ji last week - Once Baba Gurbachan Singh Ji was sitting on stage and namaskar was going on. Babaji called Shastri Ji close to himself and spoke "That particular mahapursh standing in queue for namaskar will take good amount of time..". Shastri Ji asked "So, should I take that mahapursh out of line? This way the namaskar line can advance normally." To this Babaji responded - "Shastri Ji, I am saying that mahapursh will take good amount of time, please do not interrupt him while he is speaking his heart.".
BANG!! went the chords in my heart!
Shastri Ji continued sharing that we should be a patient listener. We never know what comfort our listening can give to the speaker. Irrespective of whether there is any logic in talks we should be able to give an ear to the speaker.
another BANG!!
It seemed that I too could understand what he was trying to convey. All these years of transformation perhaps, I have witnessed what magic listening could do. Be it Amrit Auntie, Puri Sahib..I miss these souls who gave ears to my talks without any judgements. Despite their age, both of them could give me a friendly feeling. Don't know why the wire got connected so strongly with both of them that its hard even today to compare anyone else with them. Amrit Auntie...honestly I till date admire how she paid ears to my talks... any kind of talks...Sheetal's exam...My exams, My scores, My colleagues, Incidents in their lives...It seemed that every thing was of interest to her. I understood from her, what wonders listening could do.
It wouldnt be wrong if I call her my role model for listening. But I still havent managed to copy this behaviour into my life, however I wish someday I could. The 10 things to be done before I die - Listening is one thing I definately would like to do! Listening that could give support to those who need it without myself being disturbed !
Babaji, I dont know if this is a must have quality or a quality that I am destined to have, so these raw thoughts are in your hands to mould them in the best possible way! Seeking your blessings for the life ahead that could be comforting to those around me and ofcourse myself :-)
Ta!

JLT

Thank you Babaji!
I got up from bed to write a small observation at airport but before I could complete writing the experience, I realised it might not be worth sharing on a public forum. Although intention wouldnt be to comment on culture but still didnt want to sound as if laughing on the culture where I come from. Above that dont want to comment on anyone's personal likes/dislikes. So left the experience aside :)
But Babaji, thank you for these small small experiences where I am reminded of what difference you have brought into our lives.

How to loose one's Ego?

Other day I was talking to Lakshmi about the "Most wanted person by virtue of need" award which I had received for work in my previous project. Since I was the only contractor working in that project, I myself informed my Line Manager in parent company about it. Although I don't like doing this but somehow wanted it to be recorded with my parent company, that I had received some award for my work. However, after sending that email I had no replies or congrats from my Line Manager. I was surprised as generally what I have observed is, any email appreciation from client is followed by appreciation emails from all managers in parent company. Nothing happened basically after my sending that email to Line Manager. I kept quiet.

Days followed, and then other team mates received some appreciation from client. Surprisingly, this time same Line Manager sent that email to higher management which resulted in number of emails floating for appreciation. Luckily, I wasnt able to digest that, it was just an email for other team mates but an award for me. An email was heavily acknowledged but an award went unnoticed ? Perhaps I wouldnt have bothered but because it was "I" who had received the award, I was disturbed. I couldnt sit properly for some time, as this was disturbing me. I wasnt sure how I should react, but nevertheless I thought of discussing this with Lakshmi.

As I shared with her my problem, the usual happened. As predictable she is, "Sunil Ji, isko dekha hai aapne. Yeh to creator hai fir bhi kabhi nahin jataata". Lol...that was the simple tonic for the huge problem I was facing. Often I have noticed how easily she relates to the Almighty than I can do. A simple thought but with great depth, that look at the Almighty, despite being creator He never boosts about His deeds, why winning an award is making you disturbed...just because others failed to acknowledge it. It was a matter of seconds, that I was back to normal state..laughing at my ownself.

Quite truely, I still havent learnt how to be humble. Something I desire to learn, because its so soothing. I remember Babaji citing example of Lord Rama, and how humble He was when Parshuram Ji was shouting at Him. Definately, Looking at Rama's life there is so much to be learnt, the simplicity, divinity, kindness,...a whole lot of chapters in syllabus of spirituality. But again the first step as mentioned, "Pratham Bhakti Santan Kar Sanga.." Thankyou Babaji that you have sent Lakshmi in life who has guided and reminded me of your teachings where ever I was going aside.

No surprises why I always answer in same way to this question," how to loose one's ego?".."By seeing someone who is greater than you"...You'll stop worrying about not getting credit, if you understand how this Creator is silent even if His deeds are not acknowledged :)

She's Jhalli .. Guru's Jhalli !!

Days ago, I caught hold of this sister at B'mgham bhawan. I just had come out of the Namaskar line after seeking Babaji's blessings. 'Did you do Namaskar?' I checked with her.
To this she humbly replied - 'Bhaiya, I did not do Namaskar, I have had enough chances.'

I was thinking perhaps she had done it on Monday so didn't want to it again on UK trip. But later she clarified that she had done namaskar in Austria, and even after getting 4-5 chances in UK to do namaskar she had let go those opportunities. Sounded a bit strange to me - I would have understood her refusal on 2nd, 3rd or 4th opportunity but couldnt digest her refusal for all the opportunities even the very first. The mystery seemed to deepen when she said - 'Bhaiya, by doing namaskar here I didnt want to spoil the memories of the blessings I have had in Austria'.

Not sure if I could show any signs of confusion before she started unwinding her thoughts - 'Bhaiya, when I was standing in Queue in Austria, dont know why but all of sudden my thoughts changed. Earlier I stood there, thinking of some tasks, assignments but dont know when my thoughts just changed to gratitude for Babaji. The change that my life has had after His teachings. The only thought in my mind was to thank Babaji, and it seemed that Babaji too approved those thoughts because the memories I have at present are still afresh. But here in UK, I have had these many chances to do namaskar again, but every time my mind is full with some other thoughts, not experiencing gratitude for Him. And I feel this would be a wasted opportunity, if I bow down to Him thinking something else. Doing Namaskar like this would make no difference than me standing still watching Him. I dont want to spoil those memories where my mind was in complete surrenderance, to which He too reciprocated.'

Then we changed the topic of discussion, but inside I knew my thoughts were held. Her talks were not complete non-sense to me for they reflected something which I too have experienced. I dont know how she achieved this state, or is it required to copy this style of namaskar....but more than that I do need to copy this art of doing things and enjoying them at the same time. I guess this is a human tendency to do things at times even though when one is not fully present ...but art is to learn how to BE THERE.

BAU ;-)

He called me around 10. I wasnt expecting him to phone me at that hour especially when he would have been at college and I at work. Before anything else I asked him - Are you okay?

It was a bit unusual to receive his call, so I wanted to confirm if things were okay with him. He said smilingly - Ya Ya bhaiya, I just read your thought on Divine Souls group so felt like talking to you.

It was BAU...we both talking and expressing our mixed emotions. I guess phone call went for half an hour or so before we ended the call.

It always has been a pleasure to hear his voice and inspirational thoughts. I went back to the days when he too was in Bangalore and we shared a joyous time together. Then he went to Delhi for his studies and I received his call that day. That day I had contributed for 'Thought of the day' series on Divine Souls group, possibly he would have read my name and called me up. It was a pleasure again to hear him.

Day went as it does normally. While on way back I was again remembering the thoughts that he shared on the phone call that day. Also was appreciating how he connected to my name on the thought...why wont he? The thought itself was so good that anyone would have picked up his phone and called some one important in his life. The thought went something like - If you had only half an hour left in your life and one phone call to make, whom would you call? And why are you waiting? This thought is one of my favorites, and perhaps that's why I shared it with all those on the group. Reminds me not to take time for granted, each moment is precious...and should be used very judicially. Good that he called. And all of a sudden my thoughts went around - Oh ! he called me after reading that thought...but I myself did not phone anyone. Before wasting another second, I called some one whom I felt I should be hearing once again.

When I look at myself, such incidents keep happening now and then. I keep talking loud when I see you around..but at times I do fall short of what ever I myself have spoken. Maalik, bless that I follow your guidelines. Rightly did I hear that devotion is a path of selfishness. It has taken a while to understand the meaning, that before anyone else my soul needs to be cleansed. If talks give reminders to others very well but talks would be worthwhile only if I am able to follow. I remember George Ji sharing other day - Irony is that we talk about God, we don't talk to God ! May the connection between You and me keeps getting strengthened, rest is BAU ;-)

Simple yet powerful

I met this brother in one of the chat sessions.

Till date, it is the first and final conversation we have had. As our talks progressed, it unfolded that he is out of his country for studies; he further disclosed that he has stopped offering Namaz five times a day, as his hectic schedule in college doesn’t allow him to do so. Without talking too much in depth, we did agree on how much easy living becomes when we include Allah in our day to day tasks. As we spoke of Allah every now and then, brother remembered his olden days and perhaps felt that he should start offering his Namaz as regular. He promised to offer Namaz five times a day. As heard often, I just added – “That’s great! Let’s try to remember Allah in every breath. “

Before our chat session could end, this brother asked me of my nationality. I said –‘Indian’. ‘Are you a Muslim?’ was his last question. ‘Yeah’ – was a quick answer.

Since then I haven’t come across this brother. I don’t even remember if I asked his name. But till date that feeling of thankfulness is afresh. Often when I come across souls being particular about any religion, sect, group – I recall your blessings Maalik. Born in a Hindu family, educated in a Christian school, with company of Sikh friends, I was taught to appreciate Allah.

Words fall short to thank you for the bliss that you have brought into my life. May I remember to thank you Maalik!!

And please bless that may we all understand your simple yet powerful and life turning messages!!

Always remember – He’s.....

Once, a saint and his son were on way to seek Babaji’s darshan. As they crossed a market on their way, the father thought of carrying some mangoes for Babaji. He stopped at a mango shop and started checking the mangoes. The fruit seller showed varieties of mangoes, and also started mentioning about the prices. However the saint wasn’t satisfied with the quality being offered, so before moving to the next shop this saint finally asked fruit seller if he had anything better to offer. Fruit seller mentioned that there was another quality too, which was priced almost double the cost of highest priced quality saint had already seen. Saint expressed his wish to see this quality as well. This quality seemed to be the best, so saint with out a second thought bought One Kilo.

Before saint could pay the price, his son checked if they could buy some mangoes for home too. Saint happily agreed to this request. Saint asked fruit seller to pack one more kilo of mangoes but this time the ones with lowest price. Both son and the fruit seller were surprised to hear. Son however managed to ask another question – Father, if you have seen all qualities and found that one with the highest price is the best among all, the one you also are buying for Babaji, shouldn’t we be taking the same best quality for everyone at home? Or are you short of money?

Father smiled and explained – Son, I have enough money for us to buy another Kilo of the highest priced mangoes but I don’t want to give myself a feel that I am at par with Satguru. Tomorrow, we can come and buy mangoes with better quality and double this price I wouldn’t mind but at this time, when we are buying mangoes for Babaji and also ourselves, we cannot compare with what we are offering Babaji.

When I was hearing this incident from my elder bro, the very first thing I felt was why this saint differentiated? Did he miss seeing Nirankar’s form in his family members? Perhaps not, his expression there was just to give his son a message. A message that my brother gives me often, do not think even in your dreams that you and Guru stand at same level.
Always remember – He’s higher.

Sunday

I remember watching movie Sunday some months ago. Cannot recall starcast or anything else - just that it was a story of a girl who did not remember her one sunday. And magnified version of her story would be what most of us have lived - A life without sundays or A life only of sundays :-)
Born in a family set up which was already touched by your hands Babaji - from childhood till date, life has had no sundays. I remember, family members turning off TV around 1000-1030 on Sundays - Its time for Sangat. Me and siblings often used to plead - Mom please, Mickey Mouse .. Chandrakanta .. Mahabharat.. But Parents never ever cared to listen. My friends used to discuss about the cartoon shows and movies they saw on Sunday, and for me life had no sundays. Parents dont understand - I am a kid and I dont even understand what vichars are, why sangat at this age? But still I used to go to meet friends in Sangat.
Those were the years, and now life says thank you Babaji and parents. I dont have words to put Babaji - Thank you so much. Each small incident that happens in life where you show your presence and touch, It relates back to those teachings that went into ears of a small child who was unhappy for his sunday less living.
Prayers with folded hands Babaji, please continue blessing with your company. Life would have been meaningless without your presence. I have fallen short of the followings so far, dont know how the future is going to be - but with your presence, life seems to be cherished. A sunday less living :)

Satguru hi Ameer hai...

Just saw Taare Zameen Par. Somewhere how it relates to real life, and the setup as unveiled so far. Amir comes to rescue a specially blessed. Satguru, Babaji seems to be the special one who understands all of us though similar souls but still have been packed with different needs at the same time. Where people stand expecting all to be on similar grounds. He understands..all of us are different. He knows we wud die if not fed but some eat with water, for some oil has to be fatless to the extent possible.
But He's satguru, probably if people like me too wud have been broadminded, we wud understand elastics react differently to similar stresses. Bakshna Babaji.
Let me understand how special every one is to have been touched by you in your special way. Guess complete spirituality wud revolve around this learning, love ... wat ever we talk. It comes to one point soul and soul .... and soul... and the super soul.
One particular line also caught attention, It went something like baaki sabmein to usko sirf pass hona hai, uski asli manzil to kuch aur hai.

ज़रा गुनगुना लें चलो

ज़रा गुनगुना लें चलो, ज़रा मुस्कुरा लें चलो, ज़िंदगी से एक लम्हा फुरसत चुरा लें चलो !!

पल दो पल का है छोटा सा तराना, ज़िंदगी का है यही ताना बाना, यही लम्हा यादो में आना जाना, बीती बातों को जाने दो !!

I remember Babaji saying in Mumbai samagam- All that saints have been conveying is very simple but is not easily understood by people, had they understood, world would have been a heaven by this date.

Life seems to be too simple as these lines from the bollywood flick. But dont know why often we fail to understand the beauty that lies in this life. Probably 'Gyan'. People often complain about life and how it has been planned for them. Only saints or few blessed souls have the courage to speak positive about their lives despite the things they see in their lives.

I often wondered how these Bollywood songs contain the beauty that Gyan possesses. Then came the thought... Babaji !! When He can work through Jagat ji, Maan singh ji.. then why not Akhtar ji.